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Joe Kort, Ph, D, writes for Attitude Magazine in the UK Dear Joe, I am a gay guy and am only attracted to straight men.
I want a relationship with another man, but every time I try dating gay guys, I'm instantly turned off because they're usually not masculine enough.
o FORBIDDEN FRUIT The simple fact that we know we cannot have straight men might enhance our desire to want them.
The dangers involved in hitting on a straight man and the risks of humiliation, verbal and physical harassment can actually add to sexual arousal.
Not having received a father's acceptance and unconditional love, you can transfer that longing onto a series of straight men you admire. After all, people work out all types of challenges by maintaining relationships.With this, you receive a straight man's approval - which you've always wanted.(Source: Oedipus's gay brother.) o BELONGING Gay porn abounds with fantasies set in American fraternities.I like straight-acting guys, but even knowing they're gay usually puts me off I know that, by only looking/or straight men, I'll stay lonely and single foreoer. ESSEX Dear Pete, Many gay men fantasise about being intimate with straight men, and there's nothing inherently wrong with these sexual scenarios.But I don't seem to be able to help who I'm attracted to. The problem you're describing is that your attraction to straight men is so rigid that it blocks you from enjoying a genuine relationship with another gay man.
Whenever 'masculine' is defined as 'straight', it's a form of internalised homophobia, implying that gay men can't be masculine.